My Roommates from Hell

Warning: this blog post is me being salty. Please be aware the salt levels are off the charts here. Its February 20th, 2015 and this all happened around my birthday August 21st of last year. Its also 3am and this is the time when my emotions get the best of me. my-emotions-gif My first semester of college I was put into an over assigned dorm room. Basically 3 girls, in a two bedroom dorm. I was excited because I thought I would have two best friends I would get to live with and go to Trueblood (dinning hall) with. The day I met you, you both were really nice to me (later ill find out you were only nice to me only because your mom and dad were there). Once I said goodbye to my mother, I walked back to the dorm, signed in to the building and went up to the 14th floor to our dorm, I walked in and you guys were playing that Jhene Aiko song that always made me cringe because you’d play it on loop for HOURS!

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I get it, we all have different tastes in music but do you honestly have to have it on loop ALL DAY

You both just looked at me and scoffed. OK, what did I do to you to make you angry? or all of a sudden hate me? a couple of hours later you both left to go to a party, hold up girls, we just moved into college and you’re already ready to go and party? I can see into the future ladies and I can already tell how this semester is gonna go for you. I stayed in my dorm that night, crying cause unlike you i missed my parents, yeah they can be annoying, but you still love them no matter what, i wouldn’t be in college if it wasn’t for my parents. I also stayed in my dorm cause I finally had WiFi ( i didn’t have any in my house, so naturally I was fucking stoked) wifi-free-gif-865611 After about a week and a half, I’ve had it with you two, you’ve gone too far at times with me and all I did was tried to be nice to you. I would go to the Hub Lounge and call my mom and cry, I also went to my RA and talked to her about how you’ve been treating me, I was in there for about an hour just crying. That moment just brings flash backs from high school of me crying my eyes out because Leslie, Yasmeen, Kaylin, or Aminah called me fat, stupid, or not good enough. You guys were just like a combination of those four awful girls who in just three years of high school destroyed every shred of self-esteem I had, and its pretty funny cause I still can’t recuperate from the damage they did (but that’s another story for another time) tumblr_n6k7snEsrw1qj4315o1_500 One day one of you told me you got a call from housing saying that you could move out (I contracted second and she contracted last, I was not obligated to move out, you were and i wont ever forget this conversation) “Hey, Esmeralda, Did you want to move out?” “Uhm, no. I didn’t contract last. I shouldn’t be the one to move out”. “well I think you should move out” REALLY? YOU’RE THE ONE THAT IS SUPPOSED TO MOVE OUT! “ugh, yeah i guess I could leave you guys. I see you both get along very well and I wouldn’t want to break that up” “okay they said you could move out today” “okay??? ill head down to the office now and get the paperwork done and get my keys for my new room” “cool ill go with you, I wanna help you leave faster” Girl, really? Really Girl? 190cbb60a0d0d6a8bec30b2100235ca8 A few hours later I had my keys for my new room and was packing up my boxes and the rest if my shit. I can see your evil smiles as you watched me struggle with a box. After a short time, you guys just decided to help me pack up and move all my stuff from the 14th floor to the fifth floor, which really surprised me but not too much cause I knew you guys wanted me gone. Halfway through moving into my new room I met my new roommate, Angela, guys Angela is possibly the sweetest and awesomest girl around, I’m so glad she is currently my roommate. She introduced herself to me and my roommates and as my roommates were walking out of my new room they noticed a bowl of snacks that was Angela’s. “oh Girl i see you got some snacks!” “yeah I do” “Is this for anyone to grab?” “ughhhhhh sure!?” She readily grabs a bag of Cheez-Its, Like, GIRL… This is her room, like she has a bowl of food for visitors? really? You just met this girl and you’re taking her food? I’m sorry but that was really… Rude You know, I’m being perfectly honest. I was messy, I’m still messy. Girls, you had a valid argument when you called me “dirty” cause I didn’t pick up my clothes and plates but i kept track of what I did and what you guys did: Here’s a list of things I did that we’re wrong

  • Didn’t clean my dishes
  • Left a cup of tea out for two days
  • When I changed my clothes I threw them on the ground and didn’t pick them up.

Here’s a list of the things that you did wrong

  • Ate my food: really? you have an entire plastic bin of Hot Cheetos under your desk and you’re eating my fruit snacks? don’t think i didn’t notice the wrapper to my fruit snacks in the trash can and I know it was you cause I haven’t eaten those fruit snacks on campus yet!
  • Your friends would barge into the room looking for you guys and also knock really loud in the middle of the night just because they want to be little shits and wake you up. Not to mention they would come into our room high as hell smelling like weed and you would use MY PERFUME not YOUR PERFUME to spray all over them…. Really girl? you’re gonna pump 30 sprays on these low lifes you’re not even friends with anymore?
  • You would go out drinking on a THURSDAY, you guys aren’t seniors, you’re freshman like me, we have class every day.
  • You would come back from partying and throw up all that cheap jungle juice EVERYWHERE.
  • You would talk shit about me, WHILE I WAS IN THE ROOM
  • Remember those nights I wouldn’t come back and sleep in our room? You made the room such a hostile environment for me that I slept over at my friends dorm upstairs and even at a friends dorm all the way in Thompson Point.
  • One of your boyfriends was worried you were cheating on him (which you weren’t, hopefully) and he contacted me on Facebook asking if I’ve seen you around with other guys. (i said i haven’t, he was gonna visit you girl, he was a good guy)
  • oh yeah he also told me your plan you two started of trying to get me to move out of the room first because i was annoying.

All of these things are just bad and I cried a lot because of your jerk-ish behaviour. tumblr_m4vco3ncid1rpbhmao1_500 Now that its been an entire semester I can say I’ve grown since then, you guys still say hi to me on campus and i don’t want to be #rude to you so I say Hi back. But from what I’ve heard, you have had some beef with each other and even had a big fight in the middle of the night (your suite mates told me) Ladies, I’m sorry to hear you both turned on each other but look on the bright side at least you don’t have my dirty ass in the room anymore. ISLDJaC As for me and Angela, we are so grateful we get along cause i just remind her of the shit i had to deal with and we both just do the friendship dance ctlbrhW

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21 Reasons Why Playing Quidditch is the Best.

1. You get a whole new group of friends to hang out with

Once you join, you’ll think “is this too geeky?” GIRL. NO. You’re here cause you were curious about what those kids in the quad were doing running around with brooms between their legs. These new friends will make you feel comfortable with this new experience and introduce you to a whole new world with new fantastic point of views.

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2. Everyone is super friendly!

This is the Harry Potter community. Have you ever met a Harry Potter fan who just wasn’t accepting of you or just didn’t have that genuine love for others? NO! (cause we’re all pretty much nice, unless you find a horrible person, then honey, I don’t know) In Quidditch, we are each others best friends because we believe that there is magic in the world, and that honestly is the best kind of friendship around.

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3. Quidditch is all about having fun.

Yeah, competing is fun, and winning a match is even better but its always important to have fun when playing with your team!

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4. You make friends that are always there for you and watching out for you

Significant other troubles? Don’t worry they got you! Don’t have study buddies? well, now ya do! Don’t want to go to the dinning hall alone? Have no fear, the Quidditch Squad is here!

No matter your problem, Qiudditch kids will always be there for you.

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Unless you’re scrimmaging against each other, then don’t take the tackles and beats personally.

5. You learn how to tackle people, which is pretty cool.

Its scary at first, you need to learn to not be afraid. You need expect to be tackled at one point during a practice/tournament. Once you’ve popped your ‘tackled’ cherry you get to learn how to tackle, once you master that, you’ll have the new recruits scared of you.

6. You can take your anger out through a bludger

You’ll have that pesky chaser/keeper screaming for mercy after the see you throwing all your anger into the game.

 

7. Keeps you in shape.

You may not think so but you’re actually getting a secret workout. Chasers, lots of running. Seekers, lots or rough game play (and running). Snitches, lots of running (and fun). But don’t worry that running pays off.

 

8. You can compete and meet other quidd-kids from other schools

Not only is it cool to meet other players from different colleges but you get to visit other colleges and have the experience of playing an away game, plus the road trips are always pretty interesting. Considering the stages a road trip goes through.

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Pumped up for the adventure you and the team are going on

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Hopefully, you all agree to the same kind of music for the van

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and there’s always that part of the trip when you pass your other teams van and possibly moon them

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after the first hour you slowly slip into a state of boredom you’ve only experienced from that two day car ride to Mexico you had with your family when you were 8

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and of course the first pit stop is brought to you by the team member with the bladder the size of an M&M

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Then there’s the pit stop where everyone gets some junk food for the road.

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That Taco Bell Crunch Wrap didn’t sit too well

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In the end, its a memorable trip.

9. You will find other people who geek out at your obscure, yet beloved, fandoms besides Harry Potter. 

That’s right, we’re humans and we have other interests besides Harry Potter. Its always weird to hear one of your teammates say they are majoring in physics or political science or whatever. Its even weirder to hear them say they play League or Dungeons and Dragons. But still, you love and support them in all their weirdness because they do the same for you (example: no one judges my love for Queen Bey because I don’t judge their love for Legend of Zelda) We expose each other to new things and that is one of the best things friends can do for each other.

 

10. Recruiting!

When recruiting, the team will come up with some very fun and unique ideas. It’s always important to have fun when recruiting and luring new quid kids into the team!

 

 

11. The Snitch.

Possibly the best form of entertainment there is

12. Seeking.

Its a bloody difficult job to catch a crazy ass guy,dressed in yellow/gold, while on a broom, and avoiding the bludgers.

You love every second of it, don’t deny it.

13. You might care more about Quidditch than other sports.

For those of you who watch scrimmages online during lecture and keep up with the regional rosters. This one is for you. You never cared much for sports until Quidditch entered your life, who needs the Superbowl when World Cup is coming!

14. Cats

Most Quidditch players love cats. If you love cats, you belong.

15. Weird parties.

You’re in college, this is your time to branch out and let loose at parties (if that’s your thing), if you cant do it now you sure as hell cant do it when you’re 40, with 3 kids, and bills to pay. Better do it now, why not be weird (awesome) and put some Quidditch flare to it?

(cough cough)….. Quidditch beer pong.

16. Telling funny stories from weird parties.

oh they’ll mention the mystery shot dares, the bad dance moves, and the things you said while you were wasted but they do it with love. Also, they will embarrass you on purpose with these stories, just for laughs.

“Remember how you kept shushing people and whispering “don’t tell my pastor” the entire party?”

17. When you finally get your jersey and that’s all the team wears for a week.

There isn’t a better feeling when you and the Quidditch squad roll up to the dinning hall wearing your Quidd swag. Sure, the jersey may be $40-$80 but its totally worth it.

Who can put a price on this?

You can’t put a price tag on this?

18. They will cheer you on, no matter what.

They see you as family, on and off the field. They’ll be there for you in all you do.

 

19. You can be as weird as you want because all your teammates will still love you.

Yes, you read correctly. Wear your snuggie to team meetings and listen to Booty By Jennifer Lopez ft. Iggy Azalea while you make your afternoon Ramen Noodles………topless.

 

20.  You’ll be proud to say you’re on your schools Quidditch team.

When you’re wearing your Quidditch hoodie around campus and someone says “i see you guys practice all the time”, ” I was thinking about joining but I might get judged”, “(scoffs) you’re on the Quidditch team?”

Honey, please try not to hide all your jealousy all at once.

 

21. Memories

You’ll be remembering those times in Quidditch where you made life long friends. You’ll send your kid to college one day in hopes of finding their way to Quidditch (or them finding something that’s close to their heart like Quidditch is to you)